Listening to Dogs & Talking to People — The Faux Louvre pg255

Colorful companion to my memoir The Incompetent Psychic

Mernie Buchanan
3 min readMar 5, 2021


Daisy Doodle 2015

I was on the lookout for another dog… but not just any dog. I had come up with a list of seven canine qualities as a guideline. While walking past the window of a pet store a beautiful golden retriever smiled the brightest grin right at me. I went in to meet her.

A woman filling out forms was putting her up for adoption and explained, “I love this dog. She’s only a year old, but I work all the time and it breaks my heart for her to be alone in a small apartment for so long. Much as I don’t want to, I’m hoping to find a better home for her.”

I sat down on the floor in front of this darling pooch and sent her a thought question, “What do you love?”

She sent me a full color video meme of her romping and rolling in green grass with two children. I had neither the grass nor the children, assured her she was in the perfect place to find her family, and they’d be coming soon.

“I know! I know!” she laughed. — From Chapter 14

It’s rare for me to converse this well with people, much less our doggie friends. I did do workshops and improved some. For people skills I joined Toastmasters. For dogs: an animal communication workshop in Berkeley with my fur buddy Rosie years before. During one session a golden retriever showed me what it looks like to run through shallow water at the beach from a dog’s perspective. It was hilarious. Maybe this ability to talk telepathically is why goldens are so popular a breed. That my skills in this realm are so hit or miss is why the title of this book.

The skillset to share effectively in a group setting is something I had to learn with practice, and only really understood last year. The example of how another woman behaved — let’s call her Joy — was the ah ha moment most people get in elementary school. Being precocious, slow to mature and having a loud mouth mother gave me a lifetime of awkward social graces.

A few months before Covid hit I joined a local writer’s group and was getting helpful feedback. The woman who facilitated the group was a retired NYC publishing house editor. She hated the title of my memoir but I didn’t…



Mernie Buchanan

Originally from CA & Las Vegas, I now paint and write in Woodstock NY. All images are my original art & photos. Links to more at